Top 10 Worst Christmas Themed Video Games
Happy holidays everyone! In honor of the Christmas spirit, I've decided to do my first top 10 article for this blog! This top 10 is a very unique one to be sure, because I'm narrowing down the Worst X Christmas themed video games!
Christmas Nights for the Sega Saturn was a very unique title developed by Sonic Team (wow, really?). Looking at a screenshot at this game, I could have sworn that the main character was a taller Amy Rose (probably Sonic Team adjusting what assets they already had just enough to make them unique for this title.). To be honest, I'm not even sure how to play this game, because literally all you are doing is flying around in a weird 2.5D environment. However, this game was a little bit advanced for its time as it took advantage of the Saturn's internal clock. Depending on the time of year, environmental elements of the game change. For example, during December, Nightopians appear in elf costumes and the background music is replaced with an instrumental of 'Jingle Bells.'
This game lets you take your good ol' friend St. Nicholas out for a nice game of bowling. Things are all fun and games until you get there and the two of you realize that you didn't bring your bowling balls with you. "Fear Not!" old Chris Kringle exclaims. "I have just the thing!" You end up using his elves as bowling balls...This is arguably the most confusing mechanic of this game, and if that isn't enough, when you don't get a good enough frame, the elves have a tendency to moon you! This is definitely one of those mediums in which the Christmas humor is wildly inappropriate and that's why we love/hate it!
Judging from just the title of this game, you would wonder "what does this game have to do with Christmas?" Well this game centers around Gillian Seed, as he battles a group of robots known as the 'Snatchers'. (So that's how that word fits into this). Other than the setting, this game literally has nothing to do with Christmas besides the fact that one of Gillian's colleagues dresses up as Santa Claus to get the Snatchers off of his scent.
James....Pond? Alright that's a terrible pun and I'm gonna go lock myself in a closet until after Christmas. In essence, this game is a rip-off of James Bond, but involving Santa Claus and the North Pole. The villainous Dr. Maybe (are you serious?) has escaped from prison and taken to the North Pole in order to take over Santa's workshop. He has taken Santa's workers hostage and turned other North Pole residents into evil assistants. If that's not enough, a mech suit has been brought into the mix to help James Pond defeat his nemesis. This mech's name is RoboCod (for some reason) and it gives him the strength and agility to complete 50 levels (of agony).
10. Christmas Nights
9. Christmas Lemmings
Basically the same as the wildly successful 'Lemmings', the player must guide the self-destructive lemmings across the snowy landscape whilst wearing Santa Suits. However, this makes things worse when you realize that this game is nothing but a genocide to Santa Claus over and over again.
8. Elf Bowling
7. Santa's Xmas Caper
Like a lot of the games on this list, this game is an old style game that has a very arcade feel to it. This 1990 Commodore 64 game, Santa's elves think it would be funny to drug Santa's pudding. As a result, Santa becomes too hammered to fly his sleigh correctly, and so the player must help steer the sleigh. But that's not all, Santa also has to blast snowballs at evil snowmen, flying trains, penguins, plungers, candy and beach balls (what kind of game even is this?)
6. Snatcher
5. Frosty's Busy Night
If this were a XXX film, it would be the story about how Frosty lost his virginity and then proceeded to become very experienced. But this is not an XXX film, it is a Commodore 64 game (go figure) that lets the player take control of Frosty in order to bring presents back to Santa whilst avoiding obstacles that would turn Frosty into a puddle. This game reminds me a lot of E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial and was one of those games that helped to plummet the video game market of this era.
4. James Pond 2: Codename RoboCod
3. Daze Before Christmas
In this 1993 title, Santa must reclaim his workshop after it has been taken over by an evil team of baddies. Old Saint Nick must collect presents and battle foes such as evil toys, giant rats, and snowmen who decapitate themselves and use their heads as weapons (with villains this grim, im not sure how presents will be able to stop them. Maybe the Grinch effect?). If all of that isn't enough to make you cringe, this game features a power-up in the form of a cup of coffee, which transforms Santa into a horned evil creature known as "Anti-Claus" who uses his bag of toys as a bludgeon. After all, nothing says "I'm the opposite of Christmas" like a good cup of Joe.
2. Special Delivery: Santa's Christmas Chaos
This title does not sound promising at all. And it lives up to it's name. This 1984 8-bit game find Santa unprepared to do his job on Christmas Eve (as seen about 50 different time in storybooks, hymns, etc.) But this time, it is his sheer incompetence that does him in. This time, Santa overslept and only has a mere five hours to deliver presents to all the children of the world (how you oversleep until about midnight is beyond me.) Old Chris Kringle must climb aboard his sleigh (with no reindeer) and collects presents dropped by angels (what?) while avoiding those dropped by demons (again, what?). He then goes from hosue to house delivering the presents while avoiding killer children (WHAT?) who for some reason, can make him explode with a single touch. (I'm done...).
1. Santa Claus Saves the Earth
A usual December night, Santa Claus is preparing for his annual trek to deliver presents to all of the good little girls and boys. However, a wicked fairy named Nilam comes along and transports Santa to a magical land, holding him there against his will. Santa must escape and battle a random army of strange enemies such as cowboys, cavemen, minotaurs, and other various villains (none of which have anything to do with Christmas) with Snowballs and a tomato gun. How this all relates to Santa saving the Earth, I will never know.
So that is my 10 worst Christmas games, hope you guys enjoyed!
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